It's a Dance Off!

I'm so lucky that I found Christian, because no one else will ever understand me like he does.

Seriously, we have conversations that, if overheard by a psychiatrist would have us in a padded room before you could say 'Holy Batman, it's a padded room!'. We use so many in jokes, movie quotes and geek references that it must sound like a complete other language. For example, how much of the following conversation we had today via txt can you understand?

Me - I hate my work puter and it hates me :(

C - Dance off time!

Me - I was thinking a Bane Off.

C - Well it's not really a tie situation.

Me - We hate each other equally as much so that kinda counts as a tie, doesn't it?

C - It falls more into the rivalry category which would be a dance off I'm afraid. Prepare to get served.

Me - Dammit, I wonder if my good friend Voltron would teach me some of his sik moves?

C - Well unless your PC is an Atari you might want to get taught by someone who has moves that aren't from the 80's.

Me - Don't you think I could win a dance off using the Robot?

C - Not likely.

Me - I guess it would depend who was judging the dance off...do you think it would be Billy Idol?

C - Or David Bowie...

Me - Oh yes, that guy. I wonder if my equally good friend Billy Zane will be there to support me?

C - Or TVs Eric Roberts.

Me - How about Tom Ribbons?

C - He would only show up if it was a charity event for saving puppies.

Me - No puppies were saved in the event of this dance off.

C - Then Tom Ribbons will stay at home eating food that wasn't derived from animals or vegetables.
       In case you are wondering, that's mostly just dirt.

Me - But dirt prepared bu one oh Hollywood's top B Grade chefs!

C - Of course.

Me - I don't know how much longer I can keep this conversation going...

C - Yeah, I'm done.

Can you name all the references quoted above? You have 60 seconds, starting...NOW!